ENGLISH SMILES

Three Feelings: What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?

Stress is when wife is pregnant.

Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant.

and Panic is when both are pregnant.

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Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.

He shoots his friend to death.

Wife says, "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends "

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Mother to her teenage daughter: I think this is the right time we should talk about sex.

Daughter (Excitingly ): Sure mom, tell me what do you want to know...